Miley Cyrus’ Sister Is Selling Her Tears Online For $12,000
According to every person who has ever coached their friend through a breakup, it takes more muscles to smile than it does to frown. But how many muscles does it take to slip into a pair of $60 “Sadness” sweatpants, bring a bottle of squeezy cheese into bed, and wallow your night away?
Noah Cyrus, the 18-year-old younger sister to Miley, might know.
In celebration(?) of the release of her EP Good Cry, Cyrus took it upon herself to release a line of sad-girl merch with PizzaSlime. Along with the sweats, Cyrus took one for the team and bottled up her own tears in droppers that can be yours, forever, for only $12,000. (But you should run, not walk, to this pity party, as the line is only available for 48 hours.)
The sell for the tears runs as follows: “This is approximately 12 tears made by Noah Cyrus as a result of sadness. Human digestion of these tears is not suggested cause tears are generally pretty salty and that would just be super fucking weird if you drank someone else’s tears.”